I Must Do What I Must Do

Current mood: convinced, content, clear

Last night was one of my top 3 shows of all time. I played a big festival called Lifest in central Wisconsin. My friends Lynn and Alex were able to join Katie Nelson, Hoss, and I for Katie’s set at the giant indoor cafe stage. I absolutely love playing with the whole band. Drums and bass made the music so much more enjoyable. It felt right just to turn it up and let go. Not having to push the cart musically makes my job so easy and fun.

Saturday was the first chance I’ve had to run my guitar through my new laptop. Everything went splendidly. No glitches, reboots, or random problems. Plus the tone was killer coming through the mains. I’m definitely hooked on this new rig. I can practice just about anywhere now because I don’t have to set up a ton of gear, just plug in my guitar and headphones. Definitely makes it easier to do what I do.

Before our set we walked the whole campus of the festival stopping in at several shows, smelling the carnival food, watching the unpredictable interactions of the thousands of festival goers. We caught several big name acts and some not so big ones too. Sadly, I walked away from most of them feeling dissatisfied and upset. I saw and heard too much agenda every where we went. I just wanted to leave, so as to not even be a part of it all. I know I can’t, nor should I, really judge the intentions of others, but I think I should probably always be checking my own heart. So before we went on I explained to the rest of the band what I was feeling. I think it helped me tremendously to express those thoughts and keep my head in the right place.

This is basically what I said:

We are not here to entertain, act like rockstars, or put ourselves on a pedestal. We are not here to preach, pose as examples, or catalyze the masses. We are not here to spiritualize, assume leadership, or cause miracles. We are only humans, nothing more and nothing less. Above all, we must be obedient to what we have been called to do: play music and live honestly. We simply must do what we do and leave all expectations, fears, and great work in the hands of a God who knows what really needs to happen. For this cause, for this obedience, we were born.

Currently listening:
1000 Kisses
By Patty Griffin
Release date: 09 April, 2002